As a kid, you probably heard about all the objects you shouldn’t put in your nose, ears, or mouth. Well, here’s an updated list: the Dr. Streicher guide to things you shouldn’t put in, or near, your vagina!

Jade egg

Despite what you may have heard, a jade egg inserted in your vagina will not balance your hormones, increase bladder control, or regulate menstrual cycles. The only thing it does is deplete your bank account by about $66. While these eggs are probably harmless (unless they happen to get stuck in your vagina), they’re only one example of products recently touted by Gwyneth Paltrow’s lifestyle brand, Goop. After the California Food, Drug, and Medical Device Task Force dinged it for making false claims about these eggs, Goop paid $145,000 in penalties (not nearly enough, as far as I’m concerned).

Vaginal steam

The practice of vaginal steaming has been utilized in Korea for hundreds of years and was also popularized by Paltrow, who disseminated the myth that steaming would balance hormones and “clean” the uterus. Essentially, a woman sits on a mini throne while steam infused with mugwort swirls around the vaginal opening, supposedly entering and permeating the uterine walls. Beyond the fact that this is both ridiculous and worthless, there have been reports of genital burns. So steam the wrinkles out of your clothes, but for God’s sake, do not steam your vagina.

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Warming lubricant

These lubes are not warm in terms of temperature; they are intended to heat things up chemically and thus “intensify pleasure.” In some products, capsaicin, a component of chile peppers, causes the warming sensation (I couldn’t make this stuff up). Many of my patients report stinging or burning with these lubricants. They may damage tissues. If you have problems with vaginal dryness or irritation, steer clear.

yogurt in bowl on wooden table healthy eating
Keep your yogurt for what it’s meant to be: something to eat!
wilatlak villette//Getty Images

Yogurt-soaked tampons

This home remedy for a yeast infection comes up time and again via Dr. Google. Yes, lactobacilli are good for your vagina, but the strain in yogurt is not the same one that populates a healthy vagina. There are a handful of studies supporting the efficacy of yogurt and honey, but they’re extremely small, with no placebo control group. In larger, scientifically validated studies, this remedy didn’t work any better than a placebo.

Madura sticks

These cigar-shaped objects supposedly eliminate odor and white discharge (which is generally normal), and many women believe they will tighten their pelvic floor muscles and vagina, enhancing their partner’s pleasure. They’re sold in the health section of Amazon, making them seem like a legitimate remedy. The sticks contain “a secret formula using Indonesian herbs,” which likely have astringent properties that dry and damage tissue, and there are unconfirmed reports of their causing vaginal walls to become adherent, tear, and burn. I don’t need to wait for the confirmed reports to advise you to steer clear. And I’m not even going to get started on the notion that maintaining a “tight” vagina “like a virgin” is a desirable goal!


This article originally appeared in the June 2020 issue of Prevention.

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